Femyartdagmet is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, calm narwhal.

Femyartdagmet created dark energy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Femyartdagmet, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Femyartdagmet, she will make you grow a tail.

Femyartdagmet's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Femyartdagmet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak of quantum field theory near sacred fires.

2. Never fashion tools from bone.

3. Always make sure there are no bats in a building before entering it.

4. Never travel toward the east during summer.

5. Do not leap at forests.