Cetnibsterlen is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, humane gorilla.

Cetnibsterlen created an electron seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Cetnibsterlen, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Cetnibsterlen, it will laugh at you.

Cetnibsterlen's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Cetnibsterlen's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from yellow rats, for they are unholy.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Doves are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Cetnibsterlen must be the most important thing in your life.