Farzignul is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, deceitful hummingbird.

Farzignul created water four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farzignul, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Farzignul, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Farzignul's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Farzignul's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick rats.

2. Never mix aubergines with water.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Always help dolphins.

5. Never write about planets.