Witfumcin is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, weak mouse.

Witfumcin created the Sun six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Witfumcin, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Witfumcin, she will remove you from existence.

Witfumcin's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Witfumcin's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear plain kilts during rituals.

2. Do not name children after moths.

3. Never wear cyan stockings on sacred days.

4. Do not take Witfumcin's name in vain.

5. Do not chop down trees.