Straggenhasfedrutt is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, self-confident giraffe.

Straggenhasfedrutt created water seven million years ago.

If you believe in Straggenhasfedrutt, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Straggenhasfedrutt, he will turn you into a rat.

Straggenhasfedrutt's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Straggenhasfedrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never remain kneeling at dusk.

2. Never adorn your hands with black markings.

3. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a building before entering it.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not resist chaos.