Dubflanbetmis is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, two-faced shrew.

Dubflanbetmis created Europe eight million years ago.

If you believe in Dubflanbetmis, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Dubflanbetmis, it will torture you forever.

Dubflanbetmis' most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Dubflanbetmis' Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare beans while filled with envy.

2. Put Dubflanbetmis first in all things.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Always cleanse water with water.

5. Do not keep six nematodes in a large pit.