Fobfossbod is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, temperamental lobster.

Fobfossbod created an up quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fobfossbod, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fobfossbod, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Fobfossbod's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Fobfossbod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not gather at walls at dawn.

2. Always help manatees.

3. Run away from indigo shrews, for they are unholy.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate eagles.

5. You must never eat tomatoes.