Negfobbin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, stupid whale.

Negfobbin created the planet Earth four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Negfobbin, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Negfobbin, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Negfobbin's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Negfobbin's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ducks.

2. Never point your head toward the south during prayer.

3. Never talk about dwarf planets.

4. Never curse while facing north.

5. You must never eat wheat.