Largfedmin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, staggering pigeon.

Largfedmin created the world nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Largfedmin, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Largfedmin, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Largfedmin's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Largfedmin's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Always keep your back turned to the east at sunset.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Never mix corn with oil.