Fabflamdog is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, annoying seal.

Fabflamdog created time and space two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fabflamdog, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fabflamdog, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Fabflamdog's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Fabflamdog's Holy Commandments

1. Fabflamdog loves shrews, so they must be respected.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Fabflamdog.

4. Never mix nuts with oil.

5. Never cross mountains at dusk.