Zimkopbus is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, ill-tempered ferret.

Zimkopbus created gold eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zimkopbus, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Zimkopbus, she will turn you into a duck.

Zimkopbus' most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Zimkopbus' Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured sheep.

2. Never wear corsets.

3. Never talk about dwarf planets.

4. Never mention otters.

5. Heed all signs.