Bum is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, selfish rat.

Bum created the universe five million years ago.

If you believe in Bum, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bum, she will torture you forever.

Bum's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Bum's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never paint your hands black.

4. Always obey Bum's priests.

5. Never hop near horses.