Cedfabpib is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, unfair crow.

Cedfabpib created vertebrates three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cedfabpib, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cedfabpib, he will turn you into a slug.

Cedfabpib's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Cedfabpib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not place oranges upon stone.

2. Never prepare pineapples during summer.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Grasshopers are not to be trusted.