Fidyarganyim is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, boastful naga.

Fidyarganyim created the solar system nine million years ago.

If you believe in Fidyarganyim, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fidyarganyim, she will send minions to preach to you.

Fidyarganyim's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Fidyarganyim's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed wheat to horses while wearing green shorts.

2. Never look at galaxies.

3. Never write about bacteria.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never talk about dwarf planets.