Botbellwik is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, fussy guinea pig.

Botbellwik created the Sombrero Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Botbellwik, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Botbellwik, he will throw large rocks at you.

Botbellwik's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Botbellwik's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never speak aloud of secrets.

3. Never approach forests carrying wood.

4. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.

5. Never gather five cats near towers.