Wabtarp is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, emotional wolf.

Wabtarp created a down quark two years ago.

If you believe in Wabtarp, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wabtarp, it will be mildly annoyed.

Wabtarp's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Wabtarp's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Wabtarp.

2. Do not hurt monkeys.

3. Never think about nebulae.

4. Heed all visions.

5. Do not dye your hair turquoise.