Rullhamhablag is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, blissful pig.

Rullhamhablag created vertebrates six million years ago.

If you believe in Rullhamhablag, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Rullhamhablag, he will come to you in dreams.

Rullhamhablag's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Rullhamhablag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

2. Never think about optics near gulls while wearing turquoise trousers and balancing three copper spheres on your feet.

3. Never feed peas to tortoises while wearing blue skirts.

4. Never approach rivers carrying bone.

5. Always treat shrews with great respect.