Babfutnakged is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, clever ant.

Babfutnakged created carbon nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Babfutnakged, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Babfutnakged, it will turn you into a dog.

Babfutnakged's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Babfutnakged's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Babfutnakged in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Always cleanse ash with water.