Hubhangem is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, happy goose.

Hubhangem created the planet Venus two million years ago.

If you believe in Hubhangem, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Hubhangem, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Hubhangem's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Hubhangem's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle zinc while unclean.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never think about dark energy near swans while wearing mauve dresses and balancing nine nickel spheres on your hands.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hubhangem.

5. Never carve symbols of black holes into wood.