Cusskinappzen is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, generous hedgehog.

Cusskinappzen created bats two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cusskinappzen, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cusskinappzen, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Cusskinappzen's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Cusskinappzen's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate snails.

2. Do not prepare peanuts while wearing hats.

3. Run away if nine birds approach from the north.

4. Never mention great tits.

5. Never chant in the presence of elders.