Kikbessyik is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, annoying cobra.

Kikbessyik created the Sol system nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kikbessyik, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kikbessyik, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Kikbessyik's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Kikbessyik's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow eagles to witness sacred rites.

2. Do not keep four voles in a large pit.

3. Never stain your back with brown.

4. Never whisper while facing north.

5. Never write about archaea.