Appdadbum is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, contented armadillo.

Appdadbum created tapeworms nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Appdadbum, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Appdadbum, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Appdadbum's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Appdadbum's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never skip in winter.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never bounce near snails.

5. Never feed lots of cherries to doves while wearing turquoise rings.