Gomwikvil is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, duplicitous crane.

Gomwikvil created dark energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gomwikvil, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Gomwikvil, she will turn you into a mole.

Gomwikvil's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Gomwikvil's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about amino acids.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Run away from blue gulls, for they are unholy.

4. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

5. Never sing in the presence of horses.