Wabduttarp Yarpsterbiss is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, unthoughtful armadillo.

Wabduttarp Yarpsterbiss created everything that exists three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wabduttarp Yarpsterbiss, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Wabduttarp Yarpsterbiss, it will throw large rocks at you.

Wabduttarp Yarpsterbiss' most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Wabduttarp Yarpsterbiss' Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near grasshopers.

2. Shun those given to cruelty.

3. Always store gooseberries above ground.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.