Wadmetstaf is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, deceitful centipede.

Wadmetstaf created the planet Mars six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wadmetstaf, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Wadmetstaf, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Wadmetstaf's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Wadmetstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never fashion tools from bone.

2. Never laugh near swans.

3. Always cleanse water with water.

4. Do not speak about parsnips.

5. Do not speak of special relativity near sacred fires.