Lapgilhug is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unsympathetic wyvern.

Lapgilhug created bats five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lapgilhug, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Lapgilhug, he will not invite you to parties.

Lapgilhug's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Lapgilhug's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching nickel.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always face the west before speaking sacred words.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never adorn your legs with brown markings.