Talcipgembiffidrapvin is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, conceited clam.

Talcipgembiffidrapvin created vertebrates two billion years ago.

If you believe in Talcipgembiffidrapvin, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Talcipgembiffidrapvin, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Talcipgembiffidrapvin's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Talcipgembiffidrapvin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark energy.

2. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always remove shirts before entering holy places.

4. Do not study the inheritance of acquired characteristics on holy days.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force near cats while wearing white coats and balancing six silicon spheres on your legs.