Vongovcip is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, self-confident eagle.

Vongovcip created the Whirlpool Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vongovcip, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Vongovcip, he will turn you into a snail.

Vongovcip's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Vongovcip's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

2. Always make sure there are no rats in a room before entering it.

3. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not name children after shrews.

5. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.