Safsug is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, self-assured gorilla.

Safsug created dark matter two million years ago.

If you believe in Safsug, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Safsug, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Safsug's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Safsug's Holy Commandments

1. Always store carrots above ground.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never speak aloud of signs.

4. Never look at nebulae.

5. Always share cucumbers with strangers, but never with pigs.