Fobflankom is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, omniscient fairy.

Fobflankom created bats four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fobflankom, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Fobflankom, it will turn you into a mole.

Fobflankom's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Fobflankom's Holy Commandments

1. Always act with humility.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Always act with purity when addressing strangers.

4. Do not wear jumpers marked with indigo.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.