Flisjipbonk is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, temperamental raven.

Flisjipbonk created vertebrates five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flisjipbonk, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flisjipbonk, she will refuse to believe in you.

Flisjipbonk's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Flisjipbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Flisjipbonk's name in vain.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Never think about archaea.

4. Always wash your neck before prayer.

5. Never discuss photosynthesis in public assemblies.