Nilnillweg is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, thoughtless skunk.

Nilnillweg created a top quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nilnillweg, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nilnillweg, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Nilnillweg's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Nilnillweg's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick sharks.

2. Always wear plain dresses during rituals.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Nilnillweg must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nilnillweg.