Futtalfutkonnarlflamsaslag is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, dishonourable bear.

Futtalfutkonnarlflamsaslag created the planet Mars eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Futtalfutkonnarlflamsaslag, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Futtalfutkonnarlflamsaslag, she will curse you with boils.

Futtalfutkonnarlflamsaslag's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Futtalfutkonnarlflamsaslag's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with purple.

2. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Futtalfutkonnarlflamsaslag in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always maintain humility during fasting days.

4. You must pray to Futtalfutkonnarlflamsaslag eight times a day.

5. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.