Somgarlim is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, confident coyote.

Somgarlim created carbon eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Somgarlim, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Somgarlim, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Somgarlim's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Somgarlim's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

2. Remain kneeling during prayer.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.