Sitwotcab is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, omnipotent shark.

Sitwotcab created humanity six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitwotcab, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Sitwotcab, it will refuse to believe in you.

Sitwotcab's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Sitwotcab's Holy Commandments

1. Always wash your legs before prayer.

2. Hamsters are not to be trusted.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. You must love Sitwotcab.