Gidfabzim is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, competent dolphin.

Gidfabzim created an atom three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gidfabzim, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Gidfabzim, he will think nothing of it.

Gidfabzim's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Gidfabzim's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Gidfabzim in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never approach forests carrying bone.

4. Never paint your head red.

5. Never speak aloud of signs.