Titlambug is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, awesome unicorn.

Titlambug created bats seven million years ago.

If you believe in Titlambug, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Titlambug, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Titlambug's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Titlambug's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum field theory.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never carve symbols of nebulae into wood.

4. You must never eat parsnips.

5. Never feed cucumbers to turtles while wearing indigo shorts.