Dusslarptab is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, loving owl.

Dusslarptab created a strange quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dusslarptab, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dusslarptab, she will laugh at you.

Dusslarptab's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Dusslarptab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

2. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not count beyond seven during ceremonies.

4. Never allow monkeys to witness sacred rites.

5. Never handle copper while unclean.