Lipfebpak is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, fussy wombat.

Lipfebpak created a strange quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lipfebpak, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Lipfebpak, he will turn you into a rat.

Lipfebpak's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Lipfebpak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not step barefoot upon turquoise earth.

2. Never think ill of sick whales.

3. Heed all visions.

4. Do not hurt manatees.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.