Fodhonfum is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, staggering grasshopper.

Fodhonfum created humanity four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fodhonfum, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Fodhonfum, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Fodhonfum's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Fodhonfum's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear yellow.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Always wash your feet before prayer.

4. Never look at galaxies.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.