Natcarwanjin is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, strong shark.

Natcarwanjin created Mount Everest three million years ago.

If you believe in Natcarwanjin, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Natcarwanjin, he will turn you into a goat.

Natcarwanjin's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Natcarwanjin's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather four whales near wells.

2. Never chant near goats.

3. You must love Natcarwanjin.

4. Always obey Natcarwanjin's priests.

5. Always help sick mice.