Nelbetjabbess is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, duplicitous bat.

Nelbetjabbess created Africa four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nelbetjabbess, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Nelbetjabbess, she will turn you into a mouse.

Nelbetjabbess' most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Nelbetjabbess' Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not dye your hair yellow.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.