Tarbassbeg is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, almighty human.

Tarbassbeg created everything that exists three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tarbassbeg, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Tarbassbeg, it will turn you into a mouse.

Tarbassbeg's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Tarbassbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Always remove shirts before touching copper.

3. Never write about ultrasonics.

4. Never mark doors with indigo.

5. Never handle lead while unclean.