Joprawten is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, caring rat.

Joprawten created oxygen four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Joprawten, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Joprawten, she will turn you into a tree.

Joprawten's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Joprawten's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse ash with water.

2. Never jump in winter.

3. Do not fashion sacred items from ash.

4. Do not sit in public.

5. Never feed cherries to badgers while wearing scarves.