Xenyokzan is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, strong whale.

Xenyokzan created the Cigar Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Xenyokzan, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Xenyokzan, he will not invite you to parties.

Xenyokzan's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Xenyokzan's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear pink hats.

2. Xenyokzan loves mites, so they must be honoured.

3. Always cleanse blood with water.

4. Do not contemplate ultrasonics during the night.

5. Never speak aloud of names.