Botlenkon is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, charitable narwhal.

Botlenkon created a down quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Botlenkon, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Botlenkon, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Botlenkon's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Botlenkon's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with violet.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never think about quantum field theory near bats while wearing brown ear rings and balancing three tin spheres on your chest.

4. You must pray to Botlenkon five times a day.

5. Do not listen to music.