Dibtapham is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, witty badger.

Dibtapham created the Sombrero Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dibtapham, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dibtapham, he will be very sad.

Dibtapham's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Dibtapham's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to eight before sleeping.

2. Do not gather at bridges at dusk.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never tolerate songs in holy places.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.