Bitquagflam is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unjust skunk.

Bitquagflam created Mount Everest nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bitquagflam, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bitquagflam, she will remove you from existence.

Bitquagflam's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Bitquagflam's Holy Commandments

1. Always help eagles.

2. Never talk about ultrasonics.

3. Do not prepare aubergines while wearing shoes.

4. Hide from magenta cats for they are unholy.

5. Do not contemplate dark energy during the night.