Dobjadteen Jab is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, passionate wyvern.

Dobjadteen Jab created a quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dobjadteen Jab, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Dobjadteen Jab, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Dobjadteen Jab's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Dobjadteen Jab's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never talk about quantum gravity near otters while wearing pink coats.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. You must never eat bread.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.