Stiptonkcut is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, merciful unicorn.

Stiptonkcut created Africa five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stiptonkcut, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Stiptonkcut, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Stiptonkcut's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Stiptonkcut's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms indigo.

2. Never gather nine bats in one place.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never feed tomatoes to snakes while wearing hats.